The Planetary Discussion
Enjoy!
Earth 🌍
slightly drunken after the christmas revelry Pssst …
whispers Hey, Venus!
Venus 🔮
**** Just keeps rolling ****
Mars 🏀
Knock it off, Earth … Leave my girl alone, before I …
Earth 🌍
Before you what? She’s not your girl!
Mars 🏀
Growling Of course, she is
Earth 🌍
No, she isn’t … You’ve been trying for millennia
Mars 🏀
and so have you …
Earth 🌍
… and look how close I’ve come, eh?
Mars 🏀
spluttering what??? You started out closer, it’s not like you worked for it
Earth 🌍
Well, you know what they say … “Be grateful for the little things”
Mercury 🎈
Aww, man … not this again
Earth 🌍
Take a look at our little friend here, Mercury …
Pluto 🏐
shouts Don’t listen to him, Mercury.
Earth 🌍
Shut up, Pluto … You’re not a Planet anymore
Jupiter
bellows Be quiet, Tellus!!!
Earth 🌍
mutters That damned fart giant … goes to sulk behind a cloud
Saturn
cleaning its rings Don’t be too hard on him, Jupe dear
Jupiter
I know, he’s just insufferable sometimes, just because he has — what’s it called?
Mars 🏀
sighs Life! Humans! He never shuts up about them. mimics Earth
Humans just reached the moon
Humans just found the cure for polio
Humans just discovered that I’m going through global warming
Oh, look Mars! Humans are even discussing visiting you
If they ever get here, I’ll show ‘em who’s boss!
Jupiter
Oh, are they ones who sent that weird thing flying by me in 1979?
Saturn
and me in 1981?
Uranus
and me in 1986?
Neptune
and …
Mars 🏀
Yes, yes … Of course, it’s them!
They’re always pulling stunts like that
Jupiter
Why?
Mars 🏀
They’re looking for other life
Jupiter
Why would we want more of them?
Saturn
I agree with Jupe. When I want company, I’ve got my moons … all 53 of them
Neptune
and your …
Saturn
Yes, Neptune … and my rings too. Just because you have one more than I do, you have to remind me every time?
Neptune
smirks
Jupiter
Knock it off, you two … Mars, do you think Tellus is sad because it has just 1 moon?
Earth 🌍
shouts For the millionth time, my name is Earth. No one has called me Tellus in a millennium. proceeds to hide behind a cloud, humming to himself
Mars 🏀
Ha, that guy deserves whatever he gets
Mercury🎈
Yea besides, I have no moon
Mars 🏀
Haha, you had one once and lost it
Mercury🎈
What? That was a hoax!!!
Pluto
Hey, Mercury, what’s up?
Mercury
I’m burning up, that’s what.
Pluto
Well, I’m cold 😰
Earth 🌍
Again, not a planet 😂
Jupiter, Mars and Saturn
Shut up, Earth
silence in the solar system
Earth 🌍
Hey, guys … did y’all hear what Elon Musk just did?
All Planets
Shut up, Earth!!!
silence in the solar system
Earth 🌍
whispers Psst, Hey Venus
To be continued, hopefully 😂